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filler@godaddy.com
Welcome to our next lesson. It is my hope lesson one began to prepare you for the journey and work we will be continuing this week. Please refer back to lesson one when you feel the need. I believe it deepens and reinforces each lesson to revisit the prior ones. Also, take your time, while remaining consistent... allow yourself the time needed to process each weeks experience. If there are areas you feel you are not complete with, which is more likely than not, from previous lessons, allow yourself to absorb in your time. Revisit until you feel complete in those areas.
Each lesson will be available for one months time on the website. With a total of eight weekly lessons, each lesson will be available for four weeks via the link shared. The course is being edited to book format. In order to take full advantage you, my friends, have my permission to copy and paste each weeks lesson into a doc or screenshoot for your personal use. I hope you do! Please be aware that this is copyrighted material. You are welcome to use brief quotes with your own students, should you have them, or on social media giving credit to the author (Dr. GIn Love) along with the course title.
Once again, remember, the lessons build upon one another while also allowing you to revisit and review each as needed. This is not a linear process. Feel free to revisit any lesson as you feel a need for clarity and deeper insights.
As we begin lesson two I invite you to reflect on our new Empowerment Step this week; "My life is a process of learning and growth to be enjoyed and savored, not a performance or expectation of perfection."
Do you expect too much of yourself? Do you undervalue your worth and/or contributions? Take the time to reflect and journal on this topic. In doing so, reflect back and review times when you felt taken advantage of. Ram Dass has a lovely quote that states, "You can do it like its a great weight on you, or you can do it like its part of the dance." Lets agree to dance our way through this course.
Perfection is overrated, and actually quite boring. As we release the need for perfection we invite the authentic, which simultaneously connects us to a deeper acceptance of our true selves and our now (where our power resides) allowing us to open to higher realms.
Empowerment Steps
To accelerate and fortify efforts during the course we incorporate Empowerment Steps that can be immediately implemented into action daily.
This week we add a new Empowerment Step as we continue reaffirming last week's intentions:
Self-Sabotage: Releasing What No Longer Serves You
Knowing what is needed to let go of and recognizing what no longer serves us is often times evident; we simply do not want, or our not willing, to let go because who will we be when these changes come. However, there are always subconscious thought processes we are unaware of that require excavating to expose these thoughts, situations, behaviors, unhealthy relationship aspects and more, in order to be brought into alignment. If awareness is not brought to the surface, we become a house divided. We must discover those things that are reoccurring obstacles in our forward movement contributing to preventing the freeing of our full empowerment, peace, contentment, joy and passions (purpose, goals).
Inventory: Where Does Your Energy Go
As we continue to clear the sacred space within it is imperative to check our energy input and output. We have a limited amount of energy, including emotional energy, to spend each day. Taking an inventory of where our energy is going is a vital foundational step in clearing space that is being spent in areas that are not serving us.
When you think of "energy," try not to get caught up in the hype of the word used in modern day self-help. Imagine having an EKG..This procedure used electrodes to measure the energy, the electrical data, of your heartbeat. Your brain is using energy to read these words. Your cells are using energy to accomplish every physiological process in your body each second of the day. Wondrous, isn't it? When you go for a long walk, a run or hike your energy is depleted and we begin breathing heavily, you rest. Think of energy in these terms. The world, the planet and our bodies, were created through energy, operate from it and maintain life by it. No energy, no life.
Contemplate that; take it in. When we do, we quickly shift in understanding how something we have always taken for granted is the backbone of our very existence, and the need to use, spend, it wisely becomes evident. It is now time to integrate this awareness into our daily thoughts and behaviors.
To begin the process of this energy inventory sit down with your journal and title the page: Check and Balance of Energy. Below this title, on the left side of the page, begin to list the areas your energy is being spent, going out. Get deep with it. Begin with your day upon waking. What is the first thing you do? Do you check your email for work? Check your phone? Social media? Which do you need to do and what are choices? How are they affecting your energy from the first moments of your day? The first 10-20 minutes of how we begin our day can dictate the entirety of our day.
After making this check-list, consider healthier ways to begin your day; such as a brief moment of meditative prayer, thoughts of gratitude, or simply some down time taking deep breaths before you move into "let's go" mode. You will be amazed at how the smallest of changes affect us, and how they lead to other changes that eventually result in major shifts.
On the right of your checklist record and reflect on what you are receiving in return for this energy exchange. What do I gain from it? How does it get me closer to where I want to be? We must remove not only the obvious toxic energy drainers weighing us down, but also become aware of those blocking our flow that we are currently unaware. Examining where we are spending our energy helps us discover where is not well directed. This is a necessity, not an option, to narrow in on that which produces abundance. Where are you spending energy that is not producing results or creating further resistance? How can that energy be redirected to support you?
Now, imagine when you refocus all the energy you've been frivolously spending in areas that are not yielding a return on building yourself up and direct it effectively on tasks that will take you forward toward your ultimate goal. Think in small steps. We often overestimate what we can do in a week, yet underestimate what we can do in a month with consistency. These small steps add up quickly and lead to triumph. Your cup will quickly overflow to your saucer and then out into the world. Self-care results in the ability to care for others in need.
You First: Give Yourself the Permission
We have the highest of intentions. It is why you have chosen and committed yourself to this course. We want to make not only ourselves, but the world a better place to reside within. We long to help others, to be servants to those in need. Remember the oxygen mask example the stewardess demonstrates on each flight? Annoying, isn't it. It is also lifesaving. Do a web search and find an airplane oxygen mask photo and print it. Place it where you will see it each day as a reminder that it is not only 'okay' to spend this time on yourself, but an absolute necessity in order to help others through your unique offering to the world in the long term scope. While it can be initially uncomfortable to make these adjustments where we are spending our energy it is an imperative step in both the clearing and alignment as we begin to build a new way of living and being in the world.
What Have You Done For YOU Lately (Ooh, ooh, ooh yeah)
Through our automatic narrative, we can gauge our current level of self-care and worth. We may become outraged if someone outside of ourselves criticizes us, meanwhile we often (emotionally) beat ourselves up on a regular basis. This can be through self-talk, unrealistic expectations, overextending ourselves physically and mentally, harsh self-criticisms, taking on the responsibility of issues and situations that are not only not ours to carry --but are often none of our business.
The list is long when it comes to ways of holding ourselves back. We are often well-versed and extremely creative in masquerading these areas. After all, we've spent a lifetime creating them, creating false beliefs to excuse them. Be patient with yourself as you learn to recognize and surface patterns and cycles that are self-sabotaging. As you do this inner-work you will be given the power to realign, allowing your authenticity within to (re)connect you to your authentic self, your natural flow (way of being in the world both internally and externally),, and your passion, calling and purpose.
Contemplate these questions for the next few minutes and journal your responses:
For instance; I tell myself I want to develop my meditation practice but I schedule a conference call during the time I have set aside for daily meditation and my inner dialogue is excusing this by saying, I'll only make an exception this once. I can always meditate later. And later never comes.
What Have They Done For Me Lately
It is equally important to examine the relationships with others which are, and are not, serving you. You may have already incorporated this into the process. Some relationships may have outgrown their purpose in our life --and that okay. This does not necessarily require a big production of removing the person from our lives. Often it is just an awareness that it is time to cease focusing as much energy in communication -reprioritizing their priority. In most relationships, you will also be required to re-evaluate the relationship and set or adjust boundaries. Nature has its cycles, and so do we.
I cannot stress how important this portion of your energy inventory is. It's not easy. I'm never going to pollyanna significant situations. It's hard word that requires dedication to your commitment of enduring change to let go and adapt to a new way of reacting to emotions and the analytical side of it. Overthinking is a poison. Believing you are a savior is self-sabotage. It keeps you busy doing everything other than your own work. It's often programmed and deep in our subconscious. We have care for others for so long it is our natural state of being. How do I let go of caretaking everyone else before myself:? I will let you in on a secret --this is one of my own challenges which I must constantly keep myself in balance and check. Please, don't for a moment believe I or any other professional has all this down and perfect in their own lives. The greatest of maestro's hit the wrong key on occasion. The difference is, they keep going, practicing. Learning. It's not about perfection, it's about harmony in all of life.
Getting Out Of Your Own Way -Today
Self-sabotage; you may still be asking yourself - in its purest form - what is it? Put simply, it is the detrimental misuse of both the subconscious (unaware of - shadow) and conscious (behaviors we are aware of) that results in all those things we do that trip ourselves up.
It's estimated by various sources, medical and psychological, that up to 90% of our conscious behavior is controlled by our subconscious mind and thoughts. Let that sink in. It's major. I happen to believe the percentage to possibly be even higher. So you can understand the absolute necessity of being aware of your automatic (programmed) thoughts and their source which reside in the subconscious mind. We must make the subconscious conscious. Sounds great, right? But how do we accomplish this? Be patient... it's coming through the weeks of this course. Remember, trust the process and the knowing that each weeks lessons are building upon one another to take you there.
Maybe self-sabotage is showing up by your ending up in the same relationship over and over-- only with a different face. Or a job/career situation with different scenarios and you're wondering, how do I keep ending up in the same situations? You're choosing and/or attracting them for a reason, and it's a form of self-sabotage, or simply habit and lack of awareness. Remember that subconscious mind? Yeah, they're all tied together. Is it getting clearer? I hope so, and I hope you see this cycle is one you have the power to break. I also hope you forgive yourself for all the times you've been hard on yourself when, without the information required, you didn't have the information and tools to end these cycles. Well Beloved, this course is your ticket OFF the merry-go-round.
You've said it.... why do I procrastinate on my tasks/goals? Why do I sneak that donut in when I promised myself I wouldnt. Why do I make excuses not to meditate?
Self-destructive behaviors can be overcome through discipline and practice. Oh, but Gin, we dont like those words; discipline and practice. This is because we have been programmed to associate the terms with things we 'have had to do' in the past which were not pleasant, much less enjoyable. Making a choice to make friends with discipline and daily practice empowers us with the tools that birth new creations. What if you decided to make discipline your friend? What if you seen it as the key the door you're trying to unlock. What if you changed the definition of discipline to associate it to freedom?
According to Psychoanalyst Carl Jung, who I refer to ask my psychology papi, we have energy patterns, referred to as sub-personalities that we have disowned or pushed down into our unconscious (or subconscious) throughout our lives often starting in childhood. Its an escape and/or coping strategy. Subconscious patterns are resolved by becoming aware of our own reflection, triggers and reactions to others behaviors, and even more importantly, toward our own. Remember, its a process and the awareness of what is under the water is necessary. The iceberg clearly shows us that only a small portion of our awareness is above the water.
Jung coined this process as Shadow Work. Entire texts are dedicated to its ideology. For now, we need only be willing to be aware, with self-compassion and gentleness, while we examine the effects of others energy and how it affects our life experience. We do this while also being willing to embrace those parts of ourselves that will, and need to, emerge from underwater so we can begin the process of resolving and integrating our shadow-self with our conscious self. To integrate the two.. No longer do we have to be fearful or ashamed of the aspects of our inner 'demons' for we now have (and are learning) the knowledge that it is a universal experience we all experience. Throughout this course, we are developing tools to safely process what we have previously only known how to suppress or hide, not only from other, but from ourselves.
What Lies Beneath and How To Rise Above
Lets be clear; we do not consciously set out to participate in self-sabotaging behaviors, thats the true frustration of it. Therefore, (self) blame is not only unnecessary but can be detrimental in the process. Know that over the next weeks you're going to learn, and understand, what's going on and more than that; how to correct it. In lesson five, we will go into a deeper understanding of the role the mind and brain play in this. We will discuss the basics of neuroplasticity and the role of the autonomic nervous system and its enormous power in influencing our mind, body and Soul , and thus our life experience.
Our conscious mind is the mind that knows you are taking part in this lesson and reading these words. You are aware of your surroundings.
Your subconscious thoughts and mind are what lie beneath the surface and can be revealed and changed with practice in a myriad of ways. Think of that classic iceberg. Our conscious thoughts are those above the water and the subconscious those underneath the water. The subconscious world is enormous.
The subconscious influence and self-sabotaging behaviors are the things we are unaware of that effect and influence our judgements, feeling, and ultimately our actions and behaviors. Their source is not readily or easily assessable. It is why we participate in behaviors we ourselves have difficulty figuring out. Why do I do that? I don't want to do that, so why do I continue doing that?
Through meditation, hypnotherapy and other modalities we can not only access but change these automatic and programmed beliefs and patterns. Know thyself. This is the path to doing so.
In our use of the term subconscious we are referring to information and emotion our conscious mind does not have access to that affects us. I see the subconscious mind as holding varying levels of emotional unawareness and toxic residue, including the effects of significant trauma.
The subconscious mind is neither negative or positive. It simply is. It is a servant awaiting our direction in many ays. And that is the good news. It is much akin to the universe of our mind, body and Soul experience. Understanding and awareness of its workings is our master key to unlocking our inner world that produces the outer experience.
When we understand its immense power we are able to actively participate in our recovery of traumas, as well as train our mind (use its power) to aid us in healthy, productive, balanced ways of being.
It is important to have a basic understanding of these subconscious and conscious mind stages in order to understand and create change in our own minds and thought processes. I have purposefully repeated myself in this lesson because our brain needs repetitive messages to break old thought patterns and adapt new behaviors.
The danger of an untrained mind is obvious, and will be even more so as the weeks progress. You will see its role in the failure of past attempts at enduring change and more dangerous, self destructiveness.
The world is full of opportunities of distraction, escape and excuses for not taking responsibility for our own minds, and we are pros at creating them; i.e. dramas and addictions (even to our electronic devices) to name just two. Our feelings, motives, and decisions are actually powerfully influenced by our past experiences that are stored in the subconscious mind. At times it can very much feel like we are a puppet on someone else's string. Guess what? We have scissors ready to cut those strings and direct the powerful process of the mind to our favor. Imagine for a moment how life changing that will be.
Okay, we know what it is now, what do we do about it? Our goal is to make the subconscious conscious. This is where meditation, hypnotherapy, tapping and other energy modalities and exercises can come into play as aides.
The 'tape recorder' of our mind is filled with messages, but not just things said to us or by us over the years, but our perceived interpretations of events which are often false and skewed.
We unknowingly (or automatically) sabotage ourselves with fear. The 'who am I to do this, syndrome'. Who are you to not? This consistent change and challenge in perception can be enough to realign your path. Simply put, as you learn and practice the necessary ingredients to put the power of your mind in your favor, your life changes.
Learning this framework to recognize and resolve the behavior is the key to radical, enduring life shifts resulting in finding your inner power. This requires discipline, but also our attention. We are often on self-pilot. A repetitive cycle of wake-up, brush teeth (think, think, think), off to work (subconscious... aimlessly thinking some more...). How often do we stop to think about what we are thinking, which equates to what we are saying to ourselves? In other words, programming ourselves to believe about the world we live and ourselves.
No one knows your inner thoughts but you. This clearly solidifies the necessity of understanding and accepting change is an inward endeavor of discovering your self-talk and thought life. This process is the purpose of last weeks Soulwork ask you to notice your self-talk, what are you saying to yourself? Our self-talk is vital. And I'm going to go one step further.... all the "pop psychology positive talk" you have been flooded with is keeping you from healing. If it was effective, it would have worked by now. You MUST face your shadow self, clear our the garbage and align with the Divine, in order to believe the positive and beautiful words you say to yourself. You cannot fool yourself. You're Soul is deeper than that. You're being is naturally wiser than that. And now you can see why you have been bamboozled by a multi-billion industry that keeps you dependent, longing and provides you nothing enduring. Enough.
Ending Procrastination with Purposeful Creation
Do you know what you want? This seems like a simplistic question, however without purposeful introspection, we often are missing the steps, the process, one of which is narrowing in on what it is we truly want in all areas of our life. Does it mean we will have them all? No, but without identifying what it is we truly do want we are leaving ourselves in a maze of generalizations. As we move through the course write down what you want in your journal. Be precise and detailed, not general. The Rewrite lesson will be our (re)drafting of our Soul Agreement, because guess what? What you believe you want, may not even be what you truly want now. We evolve.
Being precise and deliberate gives us an opportunity to fine tune producing clarity and consistency to the intentions we are setting. Ending procrastination frees us to find our purpose, our calling, that which brings our Soul joy. The first step toward that is to address what we have been discussing during this lesson.
We are most often procrastinating because we do not know what, or how, to do what is needed to do what it is we think we are supposed to do. What if what you believe what you are suppose to be doing, is no longer, or possibly was never, authentically what your Soul longs for? Oh brave Warrior, allow this thought to excite you with possibility.
Do you see how each of these components comes together in the formula?
We now are acquiring tools to develop the precise sharp focus of what it is we desire, wholeness, and the steps required to get there. For now, simply begin to become more aware of the ways you generate the situations and excuses that lead to diversions and procrastination. Record them in your journal. We will also revisit this topic in future lessons.
Recognizing Your Personal Power
Removing the need for external validation frees us from the opinions and judgements of others. As we are released from the need for external validation it dissolves self-doubt opening us to another revolutionary experience.
If you want to be free to rise to your ultimate and highest self, the release of the need for external validation and attachment to others opinions is mandatory. In this process, you recognize and embrace -unleash- your power.
As we recognize, resolve and overcome self-sabotaging behaviors our inner power effortlessly increases, as well as our energy and creativity. It is not someone elses job or obligation to like or approve of us, its ours. And it is not only our gig but our privilege.
As you continue to move through this course it is my hope you will take the time to embrace moments of relaxation. Have a cup of herbal tea as you journal, take a warm bath as you contemplate the lessons. Enjoy the journey.
Soulwork:
In preparation for the lesson next week, reflect on a message you would like to share with the world. For several years I hosted a radio show and the final question I would ask my guests was, "If you had the attention of the world for two minutes what would you say?" Imagine you are actually being given the opportunity to share this message with the entire world. This will generate several topics you are most passionate about. Narrowing it down to choosing one is powerful.The one that feels the most genuine will reveal much. Do not worry about the elegance of words used, instead the authenticity from which they come. This will assist during next weeks lesson as we explore creating our lives passion further.
Associated Energy Exercise:
The first two lessons are freeing and intense. I invite you to end this lesson with some heart-centered compassion toward yourself. While listening to some relaxing music, or in silence, tune into your physical body as you gently rub your forearms, legs and any other area you feel drawn to. Focus on deep breathing while giving your body this extra attention. Simply be with yourself. While engaging in this exercise visualize yourself loosening and releasing all that does not serve you. Rub your body releasing it on a cellular level. You can also breathe in a healing color of Light, either white, green, pink or gold whatever comes to you. As you breathe out visualize negativity and all that is no longer welcome in your thoughts and body see it dissolving into the ethers as the breath leaves your body. Breathe in Love.Think of a time you felt the most Loved. Whether you in the arms of caretaker as a child, or playing freely in laughter... tap into moments of Love and breathe them in.
Journaling of Progress:
Make a list of reasons you have excused yourself justified for procrastinating on any project or inner-change you want to accomplish. You can also make a short list of 3-5 areas in which you feel confident you are gifted. Consider adding an additional list of areas you feel you need additional assistance from time to time. These contemplations will give birth to inviting new self-knowledge and introspection. Also, make daily notes of new realizations you encounter throughout the week.
It is my hearts prayer you take moments to celebrate yourself for the work you are doing, while being patient and gentle with yourself as you remain consistent in your daily participation of the course.
Bliss Beloved,
Gin
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